Grave Etiquette 2
Marking Graves Do’s
1. Granite is recommended for its durability.
2. Adding information can be added to the existing stone and should only cost about $60.00. It should always be done by a professional.
Marking Graves Don’ts
1. Double marking with two upright markers should never occur. This is considered as very tacky.
2. Double marking with a government lawn marker when a private gravestone is already present is forbidden by the VA. The VA. will not issue a second marker just to have the military information displayed.
A great alternative would be to contact a monument company or quarry and ask for a Lawn marker that’s considered as a “second”. This is a stone with a minor defect, usually on the back or side from having been dropped of bumped, or a color streak in the wrong spot. Check the face for flaws, the face can be perfect and will only cost you about $90.00 plus engraving.
3. Do not encase any stone in cement
Decorating graves, or “Flags in”
To place the small 4” X 4” flag, place your foot against the front center of the stone and place the flag in to the ground running it down against your heel.
For larger flags 12” X 18”, place it 2 foot lengths from the front center of the stone so as not to obstruct the inscription.
If there is a Southern Cross of Honor, or bronze plaque with flag holder, make sure they are cemented in place 6 inches to 8 inches to the right (as you look at the stone) leaving the left side open for the 12” X 12” flags.
Smaller 4” X 4” flags can still be centered in the front. Flowers can be placed in front of the stone irrespective of the flag size.
Disks or bronze grave markers with flag poles
Bronze grave markers or flag stands on steel or aluminum poles can be easily stolen when placed on a pole. Solder the bolts or screws closed to help secure it. The post should be mounted it in the same way as the Southern Cross of Honor, about 6 inches from the stone and to the right as you look at the inscription.
Markers can also be set in a cement encasement or block and placed in front of the stone and towards the right side. This treatment doesn't look quite as professional, but it works nicely. Another option is to epoxy the disk directly to the stone.
Try ordering a router bit from a Monument Supply Company and recess the marker before you epoxy it to place. This prevents screw drivers or pry bars from being used.
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